Photo by heirloomfoto

 What do I want to give my kid?

A Shelby Cobra CSX4000. Now that is a sweet car, huh?  OK, I guess that one is for me.  I love that car.  L-O-V-E.  Anybody got 100 grand?

But seriously, I want to give my kid lots of things, but cars, boats, toys, stuff like that are not on the list, or at least not near the top!  There are hundreds of important gifts that I have the responsibility to give to my son.  Confidence, respect for self and others, and risk taking, are just a few among many and I am going to try and tackle some of these topics on this site.

When I think of some of these qualities and how I want to go about developing them in my son, I remember that he is only 2 but it is never too early to start molding a mind as moldable as a lump of clay.  If a 2 year old can remember a word he heard on the radio on the ride home, how can he not remember to be respectful and polite?  But is is still only 2.

Of course, this two year bites, hits, scratches, and screams like the rest of them.  When he does that stuff, we make him apoligize but he has to take it one step further.  We make him look us in the eyes when he says it.  That alone gives him so many of the qualities that I am talking about.  When he does something wrong, he needs to have enough respect for others to look them in the eye and say he is sorry.  He has to have enough confidence to know that if he makes mistakes that he will be valued despite those mistakes.  He needs to know that looking someone in the eye is another powerful form of communication that speaks volumes about a person’s mind a soul that can’t be communicated through words.

So maybe he can make enough cash some day to buy his Daddy that car, but I will know that he will look at me in the eye when he hands over the keys!!

Photo by Leo Reynolds

This Place is Something Else

Am I talking about Phoenix or parenthood?  I guess I am talking about both.  Moving to Phoenix as well as becoming a parent has been an experience to say the least.  For both, there have been some major ups and downs but I can positively say I wouldn’t change a thing with either.  (Though I may not agree with that statement come July when it is 115 here)

Our son was born in July, and the AC must have been set to 50 degrees in the hospital, so after being there for three days, 112 degrees was a huge slap in the face.  Sometimes that kind of heat is enough to knock you over.  We got our kid strapped in, locked down, and the drive home took twice as long as the drive there three days earlier.  My wife kept saying that I was breaking too hard, turning too hard, accelerating too hard.  She thought his neck was going to break!  Looks like he lived through that one.

This is when I knew that everything was going to change.  The humidity I knew in Missouri, gray clouds, cool summer evenings all changed.  But more drastically, my sleeping in,  wasting time at work, quiet evenings out, among others changed too.  Who knew how much would change?  Sure as hell not me!!  But I wouldn’t go back.

So, in the place of a few after work beers is a few after work books.  Dr. Seuss Books to be exact.   In place of books on the shelf are a bunch of noisy toys.  In place of beer in the fridge there are bottles.  (Well, there are still a few beers)  But I wouldn’t change a thing!!!

Happy new year!!  I have my 2 year old still singing Christmas carols so I am ready to get on with 2009.  And it will start here, with this blog.  I am going to write about everything that has to do with raising a boy to be healthy, smart and well adjusted.  If any of my readers know me, they might think the deck is stacked against my boy.  And they might be right!!!  However, if I take the time to think about what I am doing with him, he might just have a fighting chance.

So what brought this blog on?  Well, since i decided that I should be a father (about the time my boy was born, give or take a week) I have read a bunch of stuff about how our society is messing up boys.  I don’t really want that to happen to mine, so I started looking around on the web and you know what I found?  Yep, nada.

Also, I think I have a unique perspective than many people out there on how to raise boys.  I currently work in education, I have been a professional coach, and I went through being all different ages of boys.  I have worked with some kids that I pray that my son ends up being like.  I have nightmares of others!  When my wife and I thought about names, we had to throw so many off the list because I didn’t want my kid to share a name with THAT kid!! 

So, here we go!!  I love my kid, I want the best for him, and hopefully through this community, my boy and your boy(s) will have the best we as parents have to offer.  Please join me on my journey to be a great Dad.  See you tomorrow!!